Last year, and a bit of this year, finding my twin flame had been of very important interest to me. I’m not sure what triggered that search or when it started, and I’m also not sure I will ever find that person, but I have assembled a few resources here for those interested in finding their twin flame. As always, you must align yourself with your higher purpose, because chances are that this alone would be enough to find your twin ray, since you’d be quite the same in your thinking and your actions. I use these terms (twin ray and twin flame) interchangeably, as they essentially mean the same thing.
What happened to my own search? I decided to abandon it. I decided that I am enough; I do not need anyone to complete me, and I am excited about simply living my life. I’m simply not interested in finding love, at all.
A distinction to make is that the twin ray is different from your divine complement, which could be anyone. The divine complement essentially is a mirror who reflects specific aspects of yourself at a certain point in time, then moves on with his/her life as usual. The divine complement is there perhaps to help you learn about yourself, but be very careful not to get carried away by this reflection. If you find yourself taken aback by it, don’t. Simply observe them, and never tell them they are absorbing “your” energy or channeling you, because whose energy is it anyway?
Besides, that action alone would bring forth the worst karma your way sooner or later. Do not forget they are subconsciously being an instrument of the universe, almost like an angel put on your path. Simply observe. I’ve experienced many of these situations; I simply thank God for having sent them in my way, and I do not invade their life thinking that I own it, or that it is about me, simply because they have shown me something useful.
Now on to our tools for finding your twin ray!
The very first step and only step to take when wishing to find love of this unique kind is to love yourself and to know yourself. Taking a break from intimacy has been a great tool for me in general. Vibrators and sex toys are actually a great place to start, even if others would advise you to have “someone there”, to give someone else that time (intimacy) until you find the right person. I do not agree at all, which is why I stopped being intimate with men for over a year now. The whole point is to be yourself, and to do what you would do. If you were just looking for love, I’d say don’t forget protection and birth control, but if you are specifically looking for a twin flame, the best bet is to stop being too intimate with others, so that you become more receptive to your own energy, which is essentially your twin flame’s energy. The more you are intimate with others, the more you block or confuse that connection. The more you are intimate with yourself, the more you connect with yourself along with him/her. Your twin ray will actually feel that. That’s why they say to touch yourself to touch your twin ray. Have a blast with it, and get creative!
Another part of loving yourself is to do what you love. Will you find them through that alone? Most likely, or maybe not! Do I care anymore? No, haha! The more I’ve done what I love, the more I’ve been interested in myself. If I’m not out in nature, I’m thinking of new blog posts or reading for class. If I’m not in therapy getting helpful tips from my therapist, I’m watching a good movie or going for a quick swim. I try to keep my mind actively interested in growing myself, even if it means sleeping late, and even if there is the occasional conflict that arises. I’ve decided to create who I am instead of asking anyone who I am. It’s amazing how that alone has made me stop even wanting to find anyone. I’ve discovered so much about myself and the world surrounding me, and I am crossing these fingers of mine about finding that dream job that allows me to travel and blog about it!
When I was looking for a twin ray, I had the sad belief that I couldn’t be happy alone. Many of my friends I no longer talk to, and so much has changed. I found myself feeling constrained and isolated. Then one day I woke up to realize that there was so much to do that I would love to do, even if alone. My family has seen that as weird, and as pushing others away: why is she just joining random meetup groups and going kayaking alone? Well, because she was done, she grew strong, and she let go!
It started out with writing poetry, that simple thing I love, then I went to parks as a hobby, then kayaking.. I dated and kissed a guy, but that melted off me. I’m more comfortable with platonic friends now. I enjoy books, I enjoy learning. Next, I’d like to try paddle boards and hiking. I joined a boating team which has been fun (though I missed some practices). And then you never know, I may just get into rock climbing! I’ve re-discovered myself, as those were hobbies that I had when living in my country Haiti anyway.
It’s a lot like what that girl went through in the “How to be Single” movie, and I guess the part they don’t show you is the fact that you literally stop wanting to find anyone, and you stop applying for endless jobs, so to say. It’s almost like letting my inner child out and being alive again, and that feels good. I have never felt happier, even when I was married. Actually, compared to how happy I am now, I could describe myself as miserable when I was married. And I will also take a moment to thank myself or every ex for having left, and every man that didn’t see himself with me when I did see myself with him… Now that I know more about myself, I’d choose myself any day over a relationship. I am also grateful because without that hurt, I wouldn’t have discovered myself. I would’ve never truly known and understood myself.
This brings us to the next step, which is to meditate, and build healthy boundaries with everyone surrounding you (not pushing others away lol). I cannot stress this enough. I started meditating religiously after a break-up (my wake-up call). And it was so funny how that situation opened my eyes to my lack of self love. Even to this day, I remind myself to take some time for meditation. Right now, I’m more focused on my mantras and on guided meditations that encourage spiritual growth (mindfulness, gratefulness, shielding, reaching higher realms, removing energetic clutter). You can always see my playlist of meditations here. I have created a meditation, “Healing the Past in the 3rd Dimension” and I love it, but you won’t see it as it is set to private since I am planning on modifying it before posting it again. I’m also planning on creating meditations for higher dimensions, which you will not find anywhere. But those are all just plans!! Anyway, my playlist is here:
But one guided meditation I have liked very much and which is specifically geared towards finding your twin ray is by Golden Rose, though I no longer do it:
Another great meditation I’ve tried in the past is this one. I like that it gives both yourself and your twin ray some space to be together in the fifth dimension, since that is where the relationship exists to begin with.
But more important than meditations to find your twin flame, are those that help you love yourself more, like this one:
I’ll end this post with a crucial note. For anyone afraid of exploring their twin flame relationship, your twin ray is not your sister, or your brother, or your mom, or your bro in law, or your sister in law, or your dad, or your grandpa, or your grandma, or your platonic friends. Those are the people who may be similar in some ways, and being around them means you’re likely to serve as a divine complement once in a while. But it is not the same as a twin flame relationship, and these energies do not mix, ever.
Remember that a twin flame relationship cannot take place until your past is resolved, and until you let go. That goes for letting go of all parties involved, which includes your environment. Twin flames are often so much of the same that they’d repeat the same things to each other. Again, remember this is not the same as being in the same soul group or having things in common with others. We all have moms and dads, we all eat food, go out once in a while, and go to work. Your twin ray is not a divine complement who reflects your energy, your twin ray is your self. This means in essence, this person is exactly the same. If you are Buddhist, they are Buddhist or open to learning from it. If you are not religious, they are not religious or are open minded. If you love to go to the park, they love to go to the park or being in nature. If you go kayaking often, chances are they feel it and have been itching to go as a result even without knowing of your habits.
Your minds communicate always. If they find themselves fascinated by palm reading, you’ll find yourself randomly studying it. This relationship is devoid of judgment, devoid of heaven or hell, right or wrong, mine or yours. It is filled with unconditional love and acceptance, but does not include everyone else. I think everyone who would have been afraid of finding their twin ray for fear of being disappointed about “who” it is, can take a sigh of relief: it’s someone you’d want to marry, and he/she would want to marry you. And believe me, they are not likely to be married, unless it is with you.